This holiday can be awkward for guys, especially if they do not have a gift. Mainly, the awkwardness comes from ladies because the woman in our lives always apply more meaning to this holiday than the guys.
Here is what I am referring to…
When I was younger and had a girl in my life, there was always this strange significance placed on the holiday, especially when it was the first we had experienced together. Should I buy her a gift? Are we that serious? Will she be angry at me if I just pretend like the holiday doesn’t exist? Is she going to apply too much significance to this gift?
Then once the decision was made to leap to a gift, the decision had to be made on what to give. There was all kinds of custom and meaning applied to the level of what was given. Am I going to reveal too much seriousness for the girl and scare her? Will she think I am way more in to her than I am?
It was a silly dance, but this sort of thing was serious stuff when I was younger.
Matter of fact, I bet all of you remember the first Valentine’s Day together with your husband or wife and this feeling of uneasiness associated with the meaning of gifts and what to give. Then we get married…
For many of us, once we are married we relax the urgency in observing or giving gifts of any kind on Valentine’s Day. We justify it by expense, or maybe, we even decide that our marriage relationship is “too deep” to rely on a superficial holiday custom like Valentine’s Day. We have more serious stuff to attend to like raising a family or running a business. Or, our marriage is defined by years together not a single day.
So guys, I am going to be real honest with you here…(Ladies you have my permission to share this email with your husbands.)
Getting your wife something on Valentine’s Day still has a lot of meaning even if she tells you it does not. Of course, you don’t have to worry with the strange dance of gift giving like I described earlier.
But, not doing something for your wife when so many others are getting flowers and cards is hard for her. Again, she may tell you it is okay, but don’t believe her. She is lying. 🙂 Of course, I mean this in the nicest way!!
Or, you might even be thinking of the agreement you made with your wife about not giving gifts for Valentine’s Day. Well Husbands, I am telling you to break the agreement. Blow it up! Destroy it! If she gets angry with you, I thinking she is faking it! 🙂 Again, I mean that in the nicest way!
Do you remember those scenes from movies in which people are at a dance and sitting on the sides waiting for someone to come up to them? And, there is always that scene late in the evening that someone did not get asked to dance. That is kind of what this is like.
Now, I am not saying that you have to spend a ton of money or be overly romantic. Spending more money does not necessarily give you more credit or points. What I am telling you is that doing something for her, anything, will make her light up! All you need to do is to give her something or take her somewhere that indicates to her that you love her. That is it.
Some of you have heard me say this before, Scripture tells us in Ephesians to “love our wives.” I am sure that you remember these verses in chapter 5 and 6.
Well, Paul when instructing the church in Ephesus is not writing a book about a good marriage. He did not give an extensive thesis on what to do with wives, husbands and children. He picked one thing. For Husbands, it was “Husbands, love your wives.”
The way you should read that is above all else your wife needs to know that you love her. Push every other priority out of the way for the sake of making sure your wife knows you love her. Do not withhold your love. Do not let an opportunity go by with out expressing it to her. When you are tired, tell her you love her. Your words should say it. Your actions should say it. Everything you do should say it.
All of the problems in a marriage can be simplified into one of two things…Either the wife does not feel loved by the husband or the husband does not feel like the wife believes in him. So, this is a big deal.
Husbands,…love your wives!
Don’t let this weekend slip by. Husbands, do something for your wife!! It can be super big or it can be small and easy. You could spend days of creative energy on it or you could simply get her some flowers, or a balloon, or card. Whatever the case might be, just make sure you do something. And, whatever you do, make sure the gift says you love her in your own special way. 🙂
If I insulted any wives in the writing of this email, please forgive me!!