I almost never get to drive my own car anymore. My daughter is constantly out and about. She has a ton of friends. Right now, as I write this letter, she is watching a movie with a good friend in our family room. A friend, I might add, who does not drive.
With a job, church activities, friends all over the city, co-op, dual credit courses at a college, volleyball, and all kinds of other stuff, she has a very active social life and a ton of friends.
Whoever perpetuated the idea of the socially awkward homeschooler has not witnessed my kids over the years. It seems that whenever my kids reach about 17 or 18 years old that I lose access to my car.
Also, it seems that at this age for each of my children that learning discernment regarding good friends and bad friends always comes up. There have been all kinds of hurt feelings over the years for my children related to bad friends.
I might add that the young lady that is with my daughter as I write this is a good friend. Matter of fact, my daughter would describe her as her best friend. And, as a father, I would have to say that this friend of my daughter is a good friend to my youngest.
Have you ever thought of what it means to be a good friend of God? Would it excite you to hear that you are a good friend to God?
I remember when I was a young Christian—about 25 years old (I was saved at 24 years old)—I remember reading the passage in John 15 about being a friend of God.
“You are my friends if you do what I command you.” (John 15:14)
When I read this, I imagined just hanging out with God. Going for a drive, or eating lunch together. Having a good time! Talking with him casually, just like he was my best friend.
Personally, I loved this. It really spoke to me as a young Christian. This study in John was my first after surrendering to Christ.
Does this idea of being a friend of God excite you? Do you hope to raise children that would be counted the friend of God? If so, this idea of friendship with God is really important because if you are going to raise children to be the friend of God, you better know what it means. Let’s look at a few verses…
Do you know who was mentioned in the Bible more than anyone else as being the “friend” of God?
It was Abraham. I would argue based on the number of times Abraham is called the friend of God in the Scripture that he was the Best Friend of God.
“Abraham believed God, and it was accounted to him for righteousness. And, he was called the friend of God.” (James 2:23)
“ (Are) you not our God, (who) drove out the inhabitants of this land before Your people Israel, and gave it to the descendants of Abraham, Your friend forever.” (2 Chron. 20:7)
“But you, Israel, (are) My servant, Jacob whom I have chosen, the descendants of Abraham, my friend.” (Is. 41:8)
And, there are many more. So, what makes Abraham such a good friend to God?
In John 15:13-17, we are given some of those qualities that identifies Abraham and even you and me as friends of God.
There are 10 qualities to being the Friend of God from John 15. I encourage you to read the verses. There ten qualities regarding Jesus’ friendship with us.
- self-sacrificing or willing to give up something you hold dear.
- do what God commands
- you know what your master is doing
- chosen or intimately known by God
- appointment by God
- movement or moving to do God’s will
- bear fruit or multiply what God gives you
- fruit that continues on or is not temporary or superficial
- asks of the Father and receives
- loves other friends of God
There is a lot here. Much more than I can unpack in this letter, but Leslie and I plan to unpack it all for you in an upcoming podcast. However, I think you have some sustenance for Bible Study to keep you busy for a while.
If you want to be a friend of God, you need to do these 10 things. Then you need to train your children how to do these 10 things.
Then you can translate these 10 qualities of being a friend of God to being a good friend here on earth to other people. Here is how I would do this:
- You’re willing to sacrifice something meaningful for your friend(s).
- You do what is important to them, especially if it doesn’t violate one of your principles.
- You both serve the same master, God. Same top priority.
- You desire to know them. Ask questions about themselves.
- You encourage each other with your mission and make it more likely to do your mission by hanging out together.
- You don’t just sit around. You do not Waste tons of time.
- You see success in what they pursue. Successes are evident.
- They pursue things that are deeper, not obsessed with the superficial.
- You pray together
- You share in a community of other followers of Christ.
There is a ripple effect when you do this. Not only does it benefit your own heart by being a friend to God, but then it ripples to relationships here on earth that enhance the enjoyment of life and blessing.
No one is meant to live without friends!
Friendship is a blessing, but how to be a friend can be taught. We were created by God for communion with him and with others.