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National Quitters Day

Did you know that there is an actual day that’s observed as National Quitters Day? It’s the second Friday of January, and it’s set on that day because more than 50% of people abandon their New Year’s Resolutions by then.  

This year it fell on January 10th.  

A quick online search reveals that approximately 80% of people make New Year’s resolutions every year, but more than half abandon these goals by the second Friday in January.  

Yikes! I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, but it is hard to enter the new year without making some decisions to reset or start a new initiative. Leslie and I do a retreat in early January every year to talk about plans for the upcoming year, both for our family, our homeschool, and Teach Them Diligently.  

I find the fact that there is an observed holiday for National Quitters Day to be a little depressing. It’s like there is an imaginary junkyard filled with resolutions and initiatives that are abandoned somewhere. Failures piled up like a mountain of despair.  

This year Leslie and I have a new strategy for our personal budget that we learned recently from a Christian financial advisor. This method is unique and involves re-learning how we approach our financial situation. And, with this new initiative, I’ve found it very easy to fall back into my old habits.  

What I’ve learned through this is that we make goals—in some cases, very ambitious and big goals we care a lot about—but we struggle against all the residue and routine we have built up to support old behaviors.  

Abraham did this after Sodom was destroyed in judgment by God. After decades of God’s blessing, caring, and sharing with Abraham, we get this scene in which Abraham moves into the wilderness between Kadesh and Shur. 

In Genesis 20, we get what seems like unexpected behavior from Abraham. He seems to return to the same strategy that he resorted to out of fear when he sojourned in Egypt back in Genesis 12:8 several decades before. 

Abraham and Sarah, who were decades younger and known as Abram and Sarai at the time, told the pharaoh and his people a little lie when they claimed that Sarai was Abram’s sister. Then they did the same thing to Abimelech in Genesis 20.  

In Genesis 20, Abraham’s excuse for this behavior was that this was their regular modus-operandi to keep Abraham safe from local non-God-fearing people. What Abraham says in Genesis 20:11-13 is that this was an ongoing strategy they employed, and besides, technically Sarah was Abraham’s sister. Ironically, Abraham is rebuked for doing this by the same people he feared.  

When I read this, there is this sense of surprise. The reason I am surprised is because Abraham by this time is living under a covenant that God will bless him with a son. He had already been saved when battling the armies to save Lot. He was spared from the destruction of the cities on the plain. God has visited him, encouraged him, and blessed him immensely. But, by doing this, Abraham and Sarah still act like they are just leaving Haran eight chapters before and 30 years younger.  

They return to their habits based in fear and not the boldness of someone clearly blessed by God.  

How does this connect to National Quitters Day? 

So many of us fail at achieving our goals and changing our behavior because we have these systems, routines and thinking associated with our old behavior. We have all this crud that supports the old behavior we want to change. Therefore, if we are going to change, we must not only change our will or goals but also tear down all the supporting infrastructure around the old behavior.  

I’ve been open with my past drinking problem before surrendering to the Lord. When I decided to stop drinking, I also stopped hanging out with the same people, going to the same places, and keeping alcohol around me. Not only did I attack the drinking, but I also attacked the supporting behaviors around the drinking.  

If you don’t do this, it’s easy to fall back into old behavior.  

This is why it is so hard to keep yearly resolutions. Your will to change is not enough. To quote James Clear from his book Atomic Habits, “You don’t rise to the level of your goals, you fall to the level of your systems.” This is true.  

The most achievable goals are multi-layered. Achievable goals focus on your will, everyday habits and break big goals into bite-sized, measurable achievements.  

If you focus on just your big goal, the chances of success are very small.  

The number of those that achieve their resolutions each year is around 13%. The reason is because we are only focused on our big goal.  

Many of you are struggling because you decided at the beginning of the year to stop a particular behavior or achieve something new that is important to you and things are not going well. The reason is that you didn’t change the supporting behaviors behind the thing you want to achieve or change.  

You are thinking a particular way… 

You are not disciplined in a particular area… 

You are watching the wrong stuff… 

You are reading the wrong material… 

You have certain thinking patterns… 

You have a particular mindset… 

You do this particular routine or habit… 

Or whatever is keeping you from your goal.  

You must attack the underlying behaviors before you can achieve what you want.  

Several years ago, I read a book called, “Will It Make the Boat Go Faster” that profiled the experience of an Olympic rowing team to win a gold medal. It is a business book, and I translated the principles from the business context to be applicable to families.

You can learn these principles and how they can impact your family this year in my Goal Setting eBook for Families.  It’s short, and you can get it by clicking here.  

I encourage you to check it out. It describes the layered approach to achieving goals a little more than I talk about here.  

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