Normally I write to the dads of the homeschoolers. That leader in the house that oversees his family and is doing so diligently. However this will be a bit different. This will be the beginning of a few post about words to live by. We all have words…we all use words…but did you realize the true potential in words? Hopefully you will soon.
Positive Qualities to Develop in Speech
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Building up
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No foul language is to come from your mouth, but only what is good for building up someone in need, so that it gives grace to those who hear. (Ephesians 4:29 HCSB)
Now I think that this simple verse sums up many things, but lets look at it for a moment. No foul language come from your mouth…this is not referring to anything about birds. If so, there would be plenty of Southern Baptist preachers in trouble when they discuss their love of fried chicken. This is pertaining to the use of your language. Something is foul when it is offensive to the senses, obscene or profane. Now, when I hear someone cussing, to me, it is offensive. With all the thousands of words in the English vocabulary some people try to make use of cuss words multiple times in one sentence. There is a gentleman at my work place that string so many words together into a sentence, that he will even blush when he talks. Parents we need to start controlling our mouths. Your children will repeat everything that you say. It does not matter if they don’t understand what you are saying or not. They notice the environment that you are in and the reaction that the words get once they are said. The children then store that away in their brain. They see you do it again and it then reinforces the first example. Soon, when your children say the same thing you did earlier and many people act shocked! Men, if you have your boys out with you and your friends, you are responsible for what they hear! Your friends are not! If your friends are known for their foul language, should you be taking your kids around them? What kind of example are you setting for your kids?
“…but only what is good for building up someone in need…” Do you just love to feel beat down? That feeling when everything is weighing on you? The depression that can set in when you don’t see any hope with your problems? Personally, I do not. I would rather have someone around me speaking uplifting words and building me up.
25 Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs it down, but a good word cheers it up. (Proverbs 12:25 HCSB)
23 A man takes joy in giving an answer; and a timely word — how good that is! (Proverbs 15:23 HCSB)
11 A word spoken at the right time is like gold apples on a silver tray. (Proverbs 25:11 HCSB)
Now let’s look at something here. You can be built up with empty words. Many of us have either blown hot air into someones head or almost left the ground because our own head was full of hot air. True friends are going to be building you up when you are in need and keeping you grounded!
“…so that it gives grace to those who hear.” I need grace. It is that simple. Grace is God’s unmerited favor. That is, grace is God doing good for us that we do not deserve. I need to hear the truth. I need to be confronted with who I am and to know that there is a Savior that can give grace and mercy to me even when I am a mess. In the Bible, grace and mercy are like two sides of the same coin. Grace is God giving me blessings or good that I defiantly do not deserve; mercy is God withholding judgment or evil that I defiantly do deserve. Because of God’s mercy, I do not receive the judgment of God against my sins; because of God’s grace, I receive eternal life and a promise of heaven though I do not deserve it. Both grace and mercy come to me though the Lord Jesus Christ.But to know all these things I must hear. Many times we are all spouting off so much un-needed talking that people tend to just cut us off when we talk. That is where we need to be selective about our words, make them uplifting, true and to the point and maybe our words will be heard by those we are speaking to.
Till next time…
I’m just a Husband of a Homeschooling Mom,
Steve Blackston